What is Polygamy?
Let us start by defining polygamy and the related words. Polygamy practically means exactly “polygyny,” i.e. it describes a many-wived man. Polygamy is the practice of having multiple spouses at the same time. It encompasses both polygyny (one man with multiple wives) and polyandry (one woman with multiple husbands). There is hypocrisy beneath the word polygamy. It is an attempt to disguise, through the term “plural marriage,” what is not marriage and cannot be considered marriage.
Polygyny
Polygyny involves a man being married to multiple wives simultaneously. It consists of marrying more than one wife at the same time.
Polyandry
Polyandry involves a woman being married to multiple husbands at the same time. It refers to a woman having more than one man as a spouse simultaneously.
Group Marriage
Group Marriage involves multiple men and women in a marriage relationship.
Origin Of Marriage
In the book of beginnings, Genesis, God initiated marriage. Let us explore what the marriage God established looked like.
Genesis 1:18–25 (NKJV) 18 and to rule over the day and over the night, and to divide the light from the darkness. And God saw that it was good. 19 So the evening and the morning were the fourth day. 20 Then God said, “Let the waters abound with an abundance of living creatures, and let birds fly above the earth across the face of the firmament of the heavens.” 21 So God created great sea creatures and every living thing that moves, with which the waters abounded, according to their kind, and every winged bird according to its kind. And God saw that it was good. 22 And God blessed them, saying, “Be fruitful and multiply, and fill the waters in the seas, and let birds multiply on the earth.” 23 So the evening and the morning were the fifth day.24 Then God said, “Let the earth bring forth the living creature according to its kind: cattle and creeping thing and beast of the earth, each according to its kind”; and it was so. 25 And God made the beast of the earth according to its kind, cattle according to its kind, and everything that creeps on the earth according to its kind. And God saw that it was good.
Verse 18 shows that God is the originator of marriage. “And the LORD God said,”It is not good that man should be alone; I will make him a helper comparable to him.” What was the purpose of God creating a wife for Adam? God created a wife for Adam primarily because Adam was alone. For God said, “It is not good that man should be alone;”. Secondly, God created a wife for Adam to be a helper. The Bible says, “I will make him a helper comparable to him.” Thus, a woman was created for a man to alleviate man’s loneliness, that is, as a companion and a comparable helper or as KJV says, “an help meet for him.”
Verses 19 and 20 show that all living creatures were formed from the ground. The bible says, “Out of the ground the LORD God formed every beast of the field and every bird of the air and brought them to Adam to see what he would call them. And whatever Adam called each living creature, that was its name. So, Adam gave names to all cattle, to the birds of the air, and to every beast of the field. But for Adam, there was not found a helper comparable to him. (Genesis 2:19–20).
But when it comes to a woman, she is a unique creature. She was not formed from the ground; rather, she was taken from man. Verses 21 and 22 say, “And the LORD God caused a deep sleep to fall on Adam, and he slept; and He took one of his ribs, and closed up the flesh in its place. Then the rib which the LORD God had taken from man, He made into a woman, and He brought her to the man.” (Genesis 2:21–22). So, woman was formed from the rib of a man. She was not created from a rib of man but rather formed.
Verse 23 provides the origin of the name woman. It was not given by God but by man. Adam is responsible for naming all creatures, including woman. In verse 23, “And Adam said: “This is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; She shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man.” (Genesis 2:23). Therefore, woman means being taken from man. It also signifies born of man (“This is now bone of my (Adam’s) bones”), and flesh of man (“This is now… flesh of my (Adam’s) flesh”).
Verses 24 and 25 give us the origin of marriage. The bible says, “Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and they shall become one flesh. And they were both naked, the man and his wife, and were not ashamed.” (Genesis 2:24–25).
Now, what is marriage? According to the originator of marriage, who is God, marriage is a man leaving his father and mother and being joined to his wife, and they become one flesh, period!
However, marriage is not men leaving their fathers and mothers to cleave to their wives to become one flesh — polyandry. Nor is marriage a man leaving his father and mother and being joined to his wives, resulting in them becoming one flesh, no polygamy. Instead, marriage is a man leaving his father and mother and being joined to his wife, and they become one flesh. Marriage is a one-man, one-woman union — monogamy.
Verse 25 indicates that marriage is a relationship between one man and one woman where there is no shame. Any other arrangement — polyandry, polygamy, multiple marriages, etc. — will result in shame. For the Bible says, “And they were both naked, the man and his wife, and were not ashamed.” (Genesis 2:25). Who were not ashamed? The man and his wife. What brings shame? Being naked.
Again, the Bible tells us, “And they were both naked, the man and his wife, and were not ashamed.” (Vs.25) It is the man and his wife who were not ashamed. This means a single man and a single woman, when naked, experience no shame. The Bible does not say, “and they were both naked, the man and his wives, and were not ashamed.” In other words, when a man has more than one wife, there is shame. Nor does the Bible say, “And they were both naked, the men and their wife, and were not ashamed.” This implies that where there is more than one man to a single woman, there is shame.
Therefore, marriage is a union of one man and one wife that does not bring shame. Thus, what brings shame is not marriage. God’s design for marriage is one man and one wife for life, or until death parts them.
Origin Of Polygamy
Polygamy is the invention of “a so-called marriage” after the fall of man. Due to sin, human beings started to practice all sorts of evil in the area of marriage, polygamy being one of them.
Polygamy has been practiced in various cultures throughout history, and it is still being practiced today.
In some societies, polygyny is common, particularly in certain religions and regions of the world, including Africa. The practice has been associated with specific religious beliefs. Polygamy is illegal in many countries, raising questions about ethics, morality, and the legal status of relationships. Even though polygamous relationships are illegal and not recognized as marriages, they can still exist in various forms.
How Polygamy Began in the World?
Genesis chapter 3 illustrates this. In verses 1 to 5, the woman is tempted by Satan. In verse 6, the woman succumbs to Satan’s temptation. The woman draws the man into the trap of disobedience.
The bible says, “So when the woman saw that the tree was good for food, that it was pleasant to the eyes, and a tree desirable to make one wise, she took of its fruit and ate. She also gave to her husband with her, and he ate.” (Genesis 3:6).
Verses 7 and 8 illustrate the consequences of disobedience for the first human beings. Initially, they recognized their nakedness and felt ashamed. Subsequently, they hid from one another and from God.
“Then the eyes of both of them were opened, and they knew that they were naked; and they sewed fig leaves together and made themselves coverings. And they heard the sound of the LORD God walking in the garden in the cool of the day, and Adam and his wife hid themselves from the presence of the LORD God among the trees of the garden.” (Genesis 3:7–8).
In Genesis 2:25, man and his wife were both naked, but they were not ashamed. In Genesis 3, man and his wife were both naked, and they saw fig leaves to cover their nakedness. In other words, they were ashamed of each other.
In Genesis 2, man and his wife were naked and not ashamed of God, so they did not run away from Him. In Genesis 3:8, man and wife (women) are naked, and they are ashamed of each other and of God, thus hiding away from Him.
Being ashamed of each other raises a question mark over their marriage. Being ashamed and hiding from God opens the door to inventing other forms of marriage. When you are ashamed of God and hide from Him, you will create your own ways. That is why the Bible warns in Proverbs 16: “All the ways of a man are pure in his own eyes, But the LORD weighs the spirits” and “There is a way that seems right to a man, But its end is the way of death.” (Proverbs 16:2,25).
Thus, polygamy, polyandry, multiple marriages, and all those others… (name them) are the ways human beings have invented for marriage that seem good to them, but the end is death.
Genesis 3:16 put women at a disadvantage in these newly invented ways of marriage. The man becomes the propagator, and the woman becomes the victim. In Genesis 3:16 the Bible says, “To the woman He said: “I will greatly multiply your sorrow and your conception; In pain you shall bring forth children; Your desire shall be for your husband, And he shall rule over you.”
“Your desire shall be for your husband, And he shall rule over you.” is a statement that has made women victims of invented ways of marriage throughout world history, in each culture and setting of civilization. Men practice polygamy while condemning women who practice polyandry. All are vices, but one group (men) has more freedom to practice it than women. All the poly — polygamy, polygyny, polyandry — are vices and wrong in the eyes of God our Maker. All should be condemned and stopped. We should not tolerate one and condemn another.
Permitting Vices against Marriage in the Bible.
Jesus, while speaking about divorce, gave a reason why some of these vices were permitted. Though it applies to divorce, the same reasoning applies to all other vices that are practiced against true marriage.
The Pharisees said to Him, “Why then did Moses command to give a certificate of divorce, and to put her away?” He (Jesus) replied, “Moses, because of the hardness of your hearts, permitted you to divorce your wives, but from the beginning it was not so. (Matthew 19:7–8).
These vices against true marriage are allowed in human life and society because of the hardness of human hearts.
Jesus said, “But from the beginning it was not so.” Then the question is, “How was it from the beginning?” In Matthew 19, from verse four, Jesus illustrates how it was from the beginning.
Jesus, speaking on how it was from the beginning, “He answered and said to them, “Have you not read that He who made them at the beginning made them male and female,’ and said, “For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh’? So then, they are no longer two but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let not man separate.” (Matthew 19:5–6).
Paul on Polygamy
Polygamy is still being practiced by many societies today, even though some nations have outlawed it. It continues to be practiced underground. Why? Because of the hardness of the heart of human beings. The Bible does not condone those vices against marriage — (polygamy, polyandry, polygyny, divorce, and the like). So, if you are a brother in the church and you want to marry a second wife while the first wife is still alive, the Bible does not allow that. If you are a sister and you want to be married as a second wife where the first wife is still alive, the Bible does not allow that.
But there are situations where the scriptures do allow these kinds of vices to progress in the church. Now note this: “to progress” but not “to start.” The Bible says, “Let each one remain in the same calling in which he was called……. Brethren, let each one remain with God in that state in which he was called.” (1 Corinthians 7:20, 24)
Now, if a person gets saved when he has more than one wife and they have children, you cannot tell him to go and divorce the other wives before continuing with Christ.
He has to be saved. He comes to the church, preaches to his family, and brings them to the church. Thus, you would allow him to continue in his polygamous state. Even though some of the marriage relationships are founded on vices that are against marriage, you will allow him to come with his family. Let him remain in the same state in which he was called. He was called a polygamous man or old man; let him remain in that state. But don’t give him or her a leadership position. However, one who is in the church and wants to enter into those vices against marriage should be forbidden with the authority of the word and the Holy Spirit.
Polygamy and the Position of Leadership
The Bible is very clear. Anyone seeking a leadership position in the church must be the husband of one wife. This can also apply to women; a woman seeking a position of leadership in the church must be the wife of one husband.
The book of Titus outlines this.
For this reason, I left you in Crete, to set in order the things that are lacking and to appoint elders in every city as I commanded you — if a man is blameless, the husband of one wife, having faithful children not accused of dissipation or insubordination. (Titus 1:5–6).
1 Timothy shows this: –
1 Timothy 3:1–7 (NKJV) 1 This is a faithful saying: If a man desires the position of a bishop, he desires a good work. 2 A bishop then must be blameless, the husband of one wife, temperate, sober-minded, of good behavior, hospitable, able to teach; 3 not given to wine, not violent, not greedy for money, but gentle, not quarrelsome, not covetous; 4 one who rules his own house well, having his children in submission with all reverence 5 (for if a man does not know how to rule his own house, how will he take care of the church of God?); 6 not a novice, lest being puffed up with pride he fall into the same condemnation as the devil. 7 Moreover he must have a good testimony among those who are outside, lest he fall into reproach and the snare of the devil. 1 Timothy 3:8–13 (NKJV) 8 Likewise deacons must be reverent, not double-tongued, not given to much wine, not greedy for money, 9 holding the mystery of the faith with a pure conscience. 10 But let these also first be tested; then let them serve as deacons, being found blameless. 11 Likewise, their wives must be reverent, not slanderers, temperate, faithful in all things. 12 Let deacons be the husbands of one wife, ruling their children and their own houses well. 13 For those who have served well as deacons obtain for themselves a good standing and great boldness in the faith which is in Christ Jesus.
God’s Warning against Marrying Multiple Wives
Every wife comes with a god or a belief from her family background. As many as you gather around you, their gods will form a confederacy against you and turn your heart from the true God. It happened to King Solomon. It can happen to you.
1 Kings 11:1–6 (NKJV) 1 But King Solomon loved many foreign women, as well as the daughter of Pharaoh: women of the Moabites, Ammonites, Edomites, Sidonians, and Hittites — 2 from the nations of whom the LORD had said to the children of Israel, “You shall not intermarry with them, nor they with you. Surely they will turn away your hearts after their gods.” Solomon clung to these in love. 3 And he had seven hundred wives, princesses, and three hundred concubines; and his wives turned away his heart. 4 For it was so, when Solomon was old, that his wives turned his heart after other gods; and his heart was not loyal to the LORD his God, as was the heart of his father David. 5 For Solomon went after Ashtoreth the goddess of the Sidonians, and after Milcom the abomination of the Ammonites. 6 Solomon did evil in the sight of the LORD, and did not fully follow the LORD, as did his father David.
Many wives can turn one’s heart away from their own worship, whether it is true worship or not. They divert your heart from the foundation of your life and beliefs, leading you away from worshipping the true God. You may have many wives, and they compete with God for your soul. There is always a battle waged against you to claim your soul, and the one who proves strongest will win a considerable portion of your heart. Thus, marrying many wives or being married as a second, third, or beyond is signing up for a lifelong battle — a battle that your descendants will inherit.
Witchcraft in Polygamy
Speaking from a practical and research point of view, there is no polygamous family life setting without witchcraft. I was born into a polygamous family. My maternal grandfather had eight wives, four of whom survived in that marriage until death. He passed away when I was still young, in 1983. My paternal grandfather had two known wives and several concubines. He died at 116 years in 2016.
Therefore, having been raised in a polygamous family, I can attest to the fact that in such a setting, witchcraft is an integral part of life. If you are not bewitched, you seek ways to protect yourself from those spells. But all of this is witchcraft.
In a polygamous family setting, envy and jealousy are prevalent. From my experience, study, and research, envy and jealousy represent the last school one attends and graduates from to become a witch.
Where there is witchcraft, all kinds of evil abound, including retardation, unexplained sickness, mishaps, and death. There are broken marriages, disunity, wars, and all kinds of chaos. It’s survival of the fittest, leading to prostitution and incest, evil altars, evil covenants, curses, and abuses, just to name a few.
The reason polygamy is not accepted in the Bible is due to what occurs in that family setting. There is always war. There may appear to be peace, but inside, there is turmoil and all manner of evil. Once the man’s struggle concludes, the conflict turns to the wives themselves. When the battles among them fail, they sharpen their weapons of war against each other’s children. Thus, it becomes a constant battle.
The worst battle is this: a friend–enemy battle. One person pretends to be a friend to another, but the purpose is to munch and crunch the one being drawn near. So be careful. Be led by the Holy Spirit.
The Impact of Polygamous Life
A polygamous life brought down the family of a man after God’s own heart.
“And when He had removed him, He raised up for them David as king, to whom also He gave testimony and said, “I have found David the son of Jesse, a man after My own heart, who will do all My will.” (Acts 13:22).
David was a man after God’s own heart. He was a singer of sweet and noble songs and wanted to be a righteous man with his whole heart. Yet, due to his tribal or family background (Genesis 38) and likely in common with all the military leaders and kings of his day, he led a polygamous life. His retributions ran along an extended line. There was a case of incest and murder among his children (2 Samuel 13). The son in whom he had the most hope and pride organized treason against his throne and lost his life in the attempt. David left his kingdom to Solomon, of whom much might be said, but it can be noted that he was evidently originally a bright, keen-witted, and wise man; yet in his old age, he succumbed to the wiles of the women in his harem. Partly due to his extravagance in his polygamous life and partly due to his attempts to build temples in distant places for the religions represented by the women in his harem, he bankrupted his nation. Consequently, his kingdom was divided at his death, and there was never again a united Israel (1 Kings 11:12). Polygamy may justly be charged with these unfortunate results.
Polygamy as a practice is like cancer. It eats away and destroys from within. Be warned.
Contributor: Pastor Gilbert Magomere Ayieko
